Saturday, April 12, 2008

Faith

DO called me out the other day while having a couple of beers at the Flying Saucer and discussing our current state and the recent odd behavior of our friends: "Now you have something to go home and blog about, but you'll have to create pages and pages of back story" The truth of the matter is, I've so far yet to blog about our non-relationship and the events that surround it. And to that, here begins the blog...

The first time I met DO was at a pool hall. He was there with his friend J, I was there with my friends, including C, whom J was dating. DO drank his beer, made some obnoxious comments, and disappeared to the bar.

The second time was at J and C's wedding a year or so later in Eagle Pass, incidentally a few months after DO's mother had passed away. At the time, I was in a relationship that was on it's last leg and had brought JW with me. The traveling troupe of friends ended up all at the same restaurant after the ceremony to kill some time, and DO proceeded to have a lot to say about J marrying C. OK, really it was more like making many barbed comments. Later that night, after everyone had put away numerous alcoholic drinks, DO delivered a toast that rubbed me the wrong way.

A few weeks later my relationship with JW had completely broken down. The next time we were in close proximity was at J and C's house for C's birthday, and I told him what I thought about his toast and his crappy attitude. He responded with an apology and stated that very few people were ever that honest with him. After that, the flirting dance began.

We dated for a few months until one of us got spooked with the idea of a relationship and the potential for seriousness (and for the record, it wasn't me). Since then, we've been in what we both refer to as a 'situation.' Not so much on-again off-again, but not with any clear definition. (Note: While I'm not looking to define a relationship as exclusive or as dating, my brain has difficulty processing our current status) There's discussion here and there, both admitting to caring for the other and all that. DO, however, has come to the conclusion that he is "too immature" to be in a relationship. Kudos for coming to a point of clarity. Not really providing much of a resolution. Patience non-withstanding, it is frustrating at times. As one of my friends told me recently, I've got it bad, sprinkled with some good.

Uncertainty and I just don't seem to get along, but I guess I always hope for a good outcome. I can't help what happens in my head, and I'm sure he can't either. Good old George puts it in some perspective with the song, Faith.

There it is in a nutshell, ('look! I'm in a nutshell!) in all its chaotic beauty. I think it's time for a tasty beverage.

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